So Adam recently got me thinking about Nerdfighterlike. A long time ago, back when I was first getting into the Vlogbrothers, I romanticized Nerdfighterlike. It’s hard not to.
It seems that a romantic attachment would be so easy to make because the Vlogbrothers videos are largely nostalgic in value. The inside jokes aren’t very inherently funny, but it really does feel like a family.
It’s also easy to understand why the Vlogbrothers seem to advocate Nerdfighterlike. They have built something up so powerful. Who wouldn’t want to see people develop connections other something they created?
But here’s why it doesn’t work.
Being a nerdfighter is a really complicated term, but Nerdfighterlike seems to apply to two people who are the we-like-the-inside-jokes-and-everything type of nerdfighter. And you just can’t have a relationship based on that.
That’s like dating someone just because you both like Doctor Who.
Certainly cool people meet cool people through John and Hank, but Nerdfighterlike - the term itself - seems to imply that the relationship is founded solely on being mutual nerdfighters
that’s just wrong.
Really? I always thought of Nerdfighterlike as just…nerds. Nerds who like one another.
Obviously, it’s more layered than that; someone can have almost identical likes and dislikes to yours and still be incompatible as a romantic pursuit, but I assumed it was just two people who were nerdy (however they define the term) and happened to enjoy one another’s company.
I think another reason that the idea of Nerdfighterlike has changed is because the term “nerd” has broadened. Being a “nerd” today refers to being an obsessive person. This obsession can be with anything: the Harry Potter series, Glee, or My Chemical Romance, to name a few popular ones on tumblr.
“Nerd” once referred to a very specific type of person who interacted with their environment and other people in a very specific way. Bearing in mind someone who fits classic definition of the introverted, academically-based “nerd,” finding someone who sees and interacts with the world in a similar way is perfectly reasonable.
People form relationships by a common bond, and if Nerdfighteria was the catalyst that brought two people together, then so be it. It doesn’t mean that being Nerdfighters completely dominates a Nerdfighter relationship.
Saying that Nerdfighterlike is nothing more than wow-we-both-like-vlogbrothers-and-you-are-a-girl-and-i-am-a-boy-let’s-be-a-couple is doing discredit to the entire concept.
However, I am all for redefining Nerdfighterlike as “a mutual squish”.